dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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