The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize