It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
