like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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