You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
