I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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