do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
