it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
