i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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