if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
