i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Randomize
