I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
