I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
