Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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