Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
