none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
