Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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