haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
