Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
