yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
