There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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