i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
love makes seman taste better
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
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