i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
