my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
