yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
