Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
