just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Ladies don't puke and tell
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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