Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
