I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize