I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Randomize
