wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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