i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
