On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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