i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Randomize
