They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
