Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
