Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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