my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
