You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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