So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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