Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
