Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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