Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Randomize
