sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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