There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
