That's intense
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Randomize
