ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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