If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
