So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
