I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
